Calvin Johnson Should be Shot and Other NFL Week 1 Musings

September 16, 2010   ·   JP Frederick   ·   Jump to comments

No, Calvin Johnson shouldn't actually be shot.  Just beaten with a bat or some form of lead pipe, I guess.  Tire iron, maybe. Or some sort of 2x4 with nails, also a good option.
It's not that stupendously grotesque rule that cost Calvin and the Lions their rightful victory Sunday.  No, that hideous, vicious, twisted subversion of logic, reason, nature, truth, justice, and the American way should have never entered the frame of consciousness.
While that ridiculous, moronic, half-baked idea should be burned from the rule book and forever forgotten, it is a rule for now.
Take this instance from last season, when Louis Murphy made a catch that walked like a touchdown, swam like a touchdown, and quacked like a touchdown - and make sure to enjoy the conspiracy theorist Raiders fan/uploader showing a New England touchdown that could've been ruled an incompletion.
Some people never forget Paris and Raiders fans will never forget the "...

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